Bo Chee (a.k.a shyness)
Most of the time, you couldn't get a girl simply because you are 'Bo Chee'. Since we've got fed up with tons of mail regarding "I am shy, what should I do?", so here's the solution to solve the character flaw of yours….
How do I know if I know I have this problem or not?
You know you would not have this problem if you are able to:
- fart loudly in crowded lifts without feeling an ounce of shame.
- wave and call out to the pretty girls at the far side of the table in a fast food restaurant.
- ogle at women, even when they are giving you those 'don't look anymore or I'll kill you' stares.
- telling the lady sitting opposite you that she isn't wearing any underwear. (I am not suggesting that you crawl under the table and look!)
If you aren't able to do this, then read on…
The most important thing to learn here is to change your mentality. Firstly don't treat your mate like god! Remember god is something that you pray all day to, and I don't think you'll just want a girlfriend just because she looks like the statue that you would like to have in your home do you?
Secondly treat her as a friend first. You are probably dreaming of a fantasy relationship like those shown on TV, so wake up your idea!
Remember, real life isn't reel life! Sooner or later you'll find out that she's just like you. (her farts is as smelly as yours :)
You don't have to be too serious when talking to her. You aren't going into a debate with her, neither is this an interrogation. Remember she's (going to be) your girlfriend, not your prisoner that you lock in a cage all day.1
Identifying your fears
Most of the time, when you see the girl you adore, you are probably nervous with fear. But have you ever ask yourself why you felt so?
Probably you'll have to identify what's making you a 'bochee' before you go about finding the remedy. To do so, just ask yourselves a few simple questions such as, besides sex, what do you want her for?2
Seriously, the main reason is that you fear making mistakes to when talking to her, giving her a bad impression about you. Although almost everyone goes through this sort of situation during dating, but has it occured to you that if you never tried, you'll never make any impression at all?
I can't really tell you on what's to be said and what's not. It comes with experience, and for most of us, it's learned the hard way. And that's no exception for you. If you never took a fall, how would you learn?
BUT, if you never try, you'll never be able to get the girl at all! Take a risk, but a calculated risk, to minimise the damage done if any.
Tip: Imagine that you are having a conversation with your 'target' and practise your conversation in front of the mirror helps.
But the problem isn't me, it's her!
So she's the shy girl eh? Basically I love shy girls, once you've got them they'll cling on you like leeches, heh :)
Well in order to win a shy girl over, you'll have to make her overcome her shyness. How? Laughter. The more likely you make her laugh and act like a clown, the less serious and nervous she is. It also changes her view of you being serious to sociable.
Warning:
Don't transform her into a clown as well!
